So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
