Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize