Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize