names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
This baby is an asshole
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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