seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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