I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
