He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
