Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
It's Friday. Sex?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
