is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
