im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
