Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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