Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
