Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
