Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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