For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize