I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
whose ass print is on the piano?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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