im about as happy as oj after his trial
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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