So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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