Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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