oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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