I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
