Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
