There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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