he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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