id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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