i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Randomize
