a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
