hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
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