her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
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I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
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at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
tell me about the eggs
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize