Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it penis luge time yet?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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