I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
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when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
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We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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