I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
