I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
