Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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