No stitches, just platelets and will power
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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