Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
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I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
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Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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