I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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