Your tits are I can't wait for
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
