Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize