Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
