Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
