Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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