I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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