I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
