Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
