and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
