To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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