Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?