I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
