I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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